Five years ago, I set myself a challenge.

I saw an image by Darren Heath that got me sweaty. It was almost like love at first sight, you know the feeling; when something grabs your attention so hard that you are instantly smitten. You can’t explain why, but you see it as a summit you just have to climb. You want that

So I set myself a challange. To learn how to bag images that would wow, as Darren Heath does.

I believe that motorsport is arguably one of the most difficult arenas in which to make a pretty picture. Everything moves at one hundred miles an hour, literally, and the facade of a racing circuit is certainly not Brad Pitts chisel jaw. They aren’t the most photogenic, and you really have to work at providing that amazement in a single frame.

This, of course, is enhanced as a spectator.

Three years ago, my enthusiasm for learning and experience was intense. There was much to aim for, techniques to explore, angles to achieve for and plenty of subjects to shoot, but as my experience has grown, I’ve found that enthusiam has continually waned, so much so that this year I have not enjoyed taking images at all. 

The repetitive nature of this hobby has lost it’s charm to such a level that I have decided to stop. If you read my ramblings regularly, you may have gathered this already by my faltering focus from previous blogs, the whinging and the lower frequency and variety this season.

Every event I have been to this year, has given me an unerring sense of repetition. This could be put down to how I have only shot images at mainly two locations this year – but I’m think my malaise is from a more creative source.

I’m a huge advocate of variety, experimenting and having a go. I often struggle with it, but force myself to think ‘around the box’ as they say.

When I began, motorsport photography was all about that. The internal cheer when you capture what you think is a banger, or a new techinque paid off. It gave me a buzz.

Nowadays, I see very little difference in what I produce, regardsless of conditions, location or subject. A pan is just a pan. A shilloutte is just dark and images of drivers simply don’t speak to me unless they are a well known face. Even then, I feel uninspired by shooting familiar scenes of helmets being adorned or eyes in mirrors. That familiarity kills the inspiration for me incredibly rapidly. I can’t explain why, but there is no longer a buzz.

Even investing in a piece of new kit or begin granted accreditation to shoot a world series event, very quickly looses it’s appeal, and I turn off. 

So I’m done. The whole point of involving yourself in such a hobby is for enjoyment, the development and experience along the way. But primarly the enjoyment.

And I just don’t any more.

I like to think that I’ve achieved much in the relatively short time I’ve taken pictures, indeed, there have been some very nice comments and inputs along the way, but the lack of sincerety about it all, the odd politics I’ve encountered combined with some incredibly bizarre attitudes and my own impatience, mean I’m done spending time and money on what has been a realtively fruitless accommodation of many a weekend.

After a while, you have to question why you do it, what the aim is. Mine was just to take a decent picture like Darren Heath.

For those of you who have enjoyed the galleries, the instagrams, read the blogs, kindly bought a copy of either of the photo books, or who have shown appriciation or been inspired in any way, shape or form, thank you. That alone is far more than I ever aimed to achieve.

Your comments and input have been totally unexpected and I honestly still don’t understand why people admire what I’ve produced. It’s just photos and they really are ten-a-penny. 

To sign off, here’s a few snaps from the 2018 Goodwood Revival, the best bit of which was smoking a cigar with my pal, and the Bristol Blenhim. Cheers all.